The Game That Drives You Popping Mad (vs Gilingham, L2)

Hello all,

First, a challenge. Can you remember the source of the title of this post? It is relevant, and you've got the rest of the article to remember. Answer at the end.

So, Gillingham. Not a lovely place, or a lovely trip for me. Down the M1, round the benighted M25. I considered going by train, but the extortionate cost (about £40 plus another six quid to park at the station) put me off. If the government are serious about getting people off the roads, they have to make public transport affordable for normal working people. Obviously most other people think the same, judging by the number of them trundling along the motorways bumper to bumper. But it kept moving (albeit slowly at times) and I was in the Priestfield Stadium by about 2.30. It's the second time I've been there, and the away facilities don't get any better. An open topped stand consisting of 'temporary' seating balanced on a forest of scaffolding poles. So long has it been there that the plastic seats are sun/rain/snow weathered and look (frankly) very tatty indeed. To make matters worse, they only open the top half of this structure, so there are loads of empty seats between the away supporters and the pitch. Not only does this spoil the atmosphere for the visiting supporters, it leaves the fans exposed to the elements. Today's weather was dry with bright sunlight (good) but an unexpectedly cold blustery wind (bad). And for the privilege of sitting in this top notch comfort? Only £20. Thanks.

The match was preceded by some cheerleading type stuff from the Gillingham girls, who all seemed to have washed their shorts on far too hot a wash. It was vaguely in time with the rather distorted music coming out of the antiquated PA. I'm at the age when peering at very young ladies with tight shorts wiggling about feels rather pervy, so I had to peep between my fingers so nobody saw me.

Thankfuly the PA announcer soon came on to inform us that the Oxford team was Clarke, Batt, Duberry, Wright and Davis, with McLaren, Heslop and Leven in midfield and a strike force of Robbie Hall, Smalley and Potter. Hmm. There's only one goalscorer there. Constable and newly returning loanee Danny Philliskirk were on the bench, along with Asa Hall, Kinniborough and Whing.

The first half started with the Us kicking towards the teetering heap of scaffolding with yellows fans balanced on it. The match was fairly even to start with, but the ref was showing signs of the bizarre style he adopted later on. After a couple of Gills corners had come to not much, during another Gills attack, one of their players went down close to half way. It hadn't been a foul, so the ref let play go on as long as the home side looked threatening. Eventually we got the ball off them and started a counter-attack. Peep! went the ref's whistle. Oh right, so it's OK for one team to play on, but not the other. And then, rather than telling the Gills to give us the ball back, he decided a contested drop ball was a good idea. Plonker.

Shortly after, Alfie got free and after a mazy run smacked the ball well wide of the goal. I say mazy, it was mostly sideways - something that was repeated ad nauseam throughout the game. The Gills had a couple of long range shots, but Clarke dealt with them with his customary ease. I am very impressed that he hardly ever spills the ball from long shots. He looks as safe as houses. Robbie Hall was hacked down in the Gills penalty area, but the weak and fussy ref waved play on. We were now in the ascendency all over the pitch, with Gillingham looking very very poor. But as happens so often, we failed to take advantage by actually scoring a goal. Smalley was having another poor game, he doesn't look threatening and up front centrally on his own looks a long way short of what we need. Alfie was running his socks off, not always in the right direction and not always picking the right option at the end of the run, but he was putting a shift in. Hall (R) is lively and bright, but we can't rely on a 17 year old loanee for ALL our goals! The lack of striking power was very frustrating, because all over the rest of the pitch we looked very good indeed.

Then, about five minutes before half time, what turned out to be the decisive incident. Smalley went down with a head injury. Gillingham played on (that's fine, it's not their job to stop the game) - the ref (who job it IS) did bugger all. Thanks again mate. What happened to consistency? Smalley had to go off (holding a cloth to his head to staunch the blood). That's fine, we've got both Constable and Philliskirk on the bench. One of them would come on.

Except they didn't. For some reason CW decided to try and hang on until half time, so the misfiring Smalley could be brought back on after being patched up. I'd have thought it would have been an ideal opportunity to replace him. But no, we soldiered on with 10 men. So when the ball came up to Potter on the right, he had no striker to give it to. So he went backwards to try and find a yellow shirt to help him. He lost it and the ball went down the other end, a decent save from Clarke went eventually to a blue shirted Gill just outside the penalty area who unleashed a thunderbolt that Clarke had no chance of stopping. If we'd had eleven players on the pitch - who knows? Personally I feel it was a poor piece of thinking.

That just about finished the half. Somehow we had looked excellent, without coming particularly close to scoring and had managed to be behind. Quite an odd half of football really. The dancers came on again, some kids kicked a ball about in the goalmouth down the other end, the wind got colder.

So the second half started with Smalley repaired (looking rather like a boiled egg in a white eggcup) and no changes. After five minutes or so, it looked as if the ref had given us a lifeline, handing a second yellow card and therefore a red to a Gills player. So they were down to ten. They'd made it count in the five minutes when we were short and now we had 40 minutes to try and do the same. Heslop had a decent shot saved by the keeper and was looking dangerous. We were well on top. But just like last week at Macclesfield, for some reason Heslop was then taken off when he was looking good, this time to be replaced by Constable. I'm not sure what this taking Heslop off tactic is. He is the one midfielder likely to score from range. So now we had Constable up the middle, Mr Egg on the right and Robbie Hall on the left. Alfie was (I think) playing behind them. The ever-reliable Davis was combining well with Potter, with each of them setting up a chance for the other. Davis's effort was a lot closer than Potter's. But it looked like a goal was likely. Hall, Constable and Potter all had decent chances.

You'll notice that Smalley's name hasn't cropped up amounst those who were peppering the Gills goal. Obviously CW noticed as well (and about bloody time) and took him off, bringing on Danny Philliskirk. Whose first involvement in the game was to get himself booked. The ref obviously enjoyed the feeling he got from waving the card, bacause he now started to wave it at any yellows player who made a tackle. In fact he lost control of the game for the last 25 minutes or so, really - I'd guess the referee's assessor is going to have to buy some more red ink on Monday.

Gillingham were now putting all their players behind the ball, and threatening on the break. In fact they scored one that was ruled out for a (correct) offside. McLaren went off to be replaced by Asa Hall whose first two touches were terrible, but settled down after that. Jake Wright made a couple of horrible defensive mistakes passing back across his own area, luckily neither of which resulted in a goal. If you are under pressure, Jake - just hoof it onto the stands or up the pitch. Rolling it across your own penalty area is a bad idea.

Then another Gillingham player got himself sent off - a straight red for a two footed off the ground lunge on Asa Hall. But there was only a couple of minutes to go. And then the golden chance for us to level it. Constable beat the offside trap, lobbing t he oncoming goalkeeper. But with the whole goal to go for, he put it three yards wide of the right hand post. Noooooo.

And that was about it. The ref waved cards at Oxford players for no good reason, Clarke kept the score down to one with a good save, and that was it. Bugger. We'd done more than enough over the course of the match to earn at least a point, probably three. Poor finishing had cost us. But it was difficult to be too downhearted. We had lost, but the performance had been good. Much better than at Macc, where we had earned a point. Perhaps if we pretend that we had lost at Macclesfield and drawn at Gillingham? Yes, that's better.

Quickly out of the ground, back onto an ever slower M25, a dash up the A1(M) as an alternative to the M1 and home.

Thoughts from the day:

I am sorry, but I don't think Smalley is good enough. Every striker has lean patches where the don't score. But Smalley isn't even involved in the game for 90% of the time. There are a lot of things he can do when not directly involved. Track back, tackle, make runs across the defence to make space for teammates, just make a nuisance of himself. Maybe he needs to play in a team where he gets better delivery? Maybe he's injured? I don't know what it is - but give me a striker who is missing goals rather than one who goes missing any day.

We are still a bit sluggish in midfield. Heslop isn't quick either, but at least he carries a goal threat. Keep him on.

When BOTH sets of supporters are singing 'you don't know what you're doing' at the ref at the same time, you know he's had a total stinker.

A losing performance that was more encouraging than last weekend's draw.

Two home matches next - Plymouth on Tuesday and Port Vale on Saturday. Given that the two matches after that are away to Southend and Crawley, I think the two home matches are pretty much 'must wins' if we want to be able to look at the table without wincing in a month's time.

See you on Tuesday - COME ON YOU YELLOWS.

And the title of this post is the 'catchphrase' for the boardgame Frustration, which sums up my feeling about today!